Starfield:Bad People, Bad Jokes
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| This is a compilation of books assembled for easier reading. |
Bad People, Bad Jokes
by Louis Lupper
Volume 1
- Knock knock. Who's there? Va'ruun. Va'ruun who? Va'ruun! Va'ruun! Listen to that engine!
- An alien spider-beast walks into a bar in Akila City. Bartender asks, "What's your poison?"
- Why did the Crimson Fleet pirate go to an Enhance! clinic? He wanted more booty.
- Knock knock. Who's there? Neon. Neon who? You put one knee on the floor to
genuflect, two knees to kneel.
- You hear the one about the Freestar Ranger who couldn't get into the conference? He forgot his badge.
[Louis Lupper's Bad People, Bad Jokes has garnered something of a cult following in the Settled Systems, and is particularly popular among the criminal element in the major cities.]
Volume 2
- Why did the chicken cross the road? Huh? What's a "chicken"?
- Knock knock. Who's there? Planet. Planet who? If I throw a party, will you help me plan it?
- Ecliptic mercenary says to a woman, "I've been hired to kill you and I always get the job done!" Woman says, "Can't we talk about this, son?"
- How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
- How do you get a Freestar Collective hick out of a tree? Wave.
[Louis Lupper's Bad People, Bad Jokes Volume 2 is the follow up to his original work, and just like its predecessor, has become a cult hit.]
Volume 3
- A Chunks chunk walks into a bar. Bartender says, "We don't serve food here." Chunk sit down and says, "Then I guess I'm in the right place."
- Knock knock. Who's there? Broken sword. Broken sword who? Oh, never mind - it's pointless.
- How many atheists does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. They're already Enlightened.
- What's the last thing to go through a Freestar Militia member's mind when they meet a United Colonies Marine? A laser beam.
- Why don't Terrormorphs eat clowns? They taste funny.
[Unlike the first two volumes he published, Louis Lupper's Bad People, Bad Jokes Volume 3 never really gained much of an audience. Popular theory suggests that by the time of its release, people were already tired of Lupper's terrible jokes.]
